Category: MOTHERHOOD

Me and my Menstrual Cycle: Connecting to my Body and Myself as a Woman

~ womeninlivingness

I am a 43 year-young woman and for most of my life I have had no relationship with my menstrual cycle. At some point, I found out that there was such a thing as ‘menstruation’ and at the age of 14, wearing white pants on that particular day (how convenient…), it started for me in the toilet at school. I had my first menstruation and I had no idea what to do. I felt awkward and embarrassed, especially because it was on a day that my father picked me up and suggested we go for a long walk with the dogs. That was the longest walk of my life. I asked my two older sisters for support and I was introduced into the world of sanitary pads. And having my monthly period.

And so my life continued…

At the age of 16 I had my first boyfriend and my mother suggested taking the pill. Not because I had difficulties with my period, but for birth control. After that, for many years to follow, and having several relationships, I took the pill, had my monthly ‘fake’ menstruation, put in a tampon (so much more convenient than those big sanitary towel ‘mattresses’), and I lived my life; A life without any connection to my cycle, my body, my uterus, my ovaries, my breasts, my menstruation, my ovulation – in other words, to the fact that I was a woman, with a menstrual cycle.

I never took a moment to ask myself what it actually means to be a woman, let alone what it means to live as a woman.

Continue reading “Me and my Menstrual Cycle: Connecting to my Body and Myself as a Woman” →

The True Beauty of Pregnancy – Embracing the Stillness of a Woman

~ womeninlivingness

Pregnancy is a time of new beginnings and not just because there is a new person growing and developing inside. The true beauty of pregnancy is that it offers the opportunity for a deep change to take place in the way we live as women. A change that is initiated from deep within and supported by all that is offered during pregnancy.

Pregnancy is a time for us, as women, to experience ourselves more deeply as the delicate, sensitive and nurturing women we naturally are.

I have had the opportunity to be pregnant twice and from these pregnancies I now have two amazing daughters. Each time I learnt a profound amount about how I was living as a woman leading up to each pregnancy and the changes that were needed as each one progressed.

Continue reading “The True Beauty of Pregnancy – Embracing the Stillness of a Woman” →

Miscarriage – The Blessing That Opened Me Up To True Motherhood

~ womeninlivingness

I was the Perfect Modern time Woman.

Travelling the world, successful, different not mainstream, fun to be with, partying lifestyle, good-looking and with a job that had the purpose to change the structures we live in and make the world a better place. Yet at the same time I was bored with life and could not see its deeper meaning. Getting older, having a family and importantly raising kids seemed to be the sole purpose to life, but I already did this back in my early twenties supporting my sister in bringing up her daughter, my niece. The role of ‘mothering’ came easily to me and felt very natural; I just loved taking care of little kids and babies. I enjoyed their easiness and calmness. But the event of my years’ later miscarriage offered me a different view and opened me up to the possibility of what true mothering and motherhood was, and that this first stemmed from a way in which I treated and looked after myself. Continue reading “Miscarriage – The Blessing That Opened Me Up To True Motherhood” →

5 Motherhood Myths

~ womeninlivingness

I have spent a lot of my mothering time navigating my way through the rules, regulations and rights and wrongs of motherhood. It is an area of life that is so littered with ‘shoulds’ and ‘should nots’ and idealism and beliefs, that I felt it would be fun to shine a light on some of these motherhood myths:

MOTHERHOOD MYTH 1: Caring for myself is indulgent and selfish.

Now this is rampant in society, outside of motherhood as well as in and lots of us come into it with this belief deeply entrenched. Looking back I can see that I was brutal with myself and so dis-respectful, expecting to function on poor sleep, rubbish food, toxins and stimulants. I was aware of the saying that ‘you cannot look after others if you do not look after yourself’, but heard that as: do the minimum for yourself to keep functioning so that you can still look after others. It has taken me some time to break through and really know that I cannot share anything with others unless it is practiced and lived by me. If I want my children to care for themselves, they have to see me caring for myself first. Continue reading “5 Motherhood Myths” →

The Roles We Hide In

~ womeninlivingness

Throughout my childhood I took on roles so that the world would see me, and so that I knew who I was.  Sometimes the ‘tidier’, sometimes the ‘wrecker’, sometimes the ‘quiet one’ and sometimes the ‘screamer’.  As time went on I began to cement these roles, becoming known as the peacemaker and carer within my family.

If I had a role then everything made sense.  Without thinking, I could work from the script.

Continue reading “The Roles We Hide In” →

Perfect Family Picture or NOT?

~ womeninlivingness

by Nicole Serafin, Woman, Wife, Mother, Self-employed Pharmacy Receptionist, NSW, Australia

Have you ever felt dissatisfied with life, not happy with what you have or where you are at, using half-truths or manipulation to control or create a situation, pretending everything is ok when it is not? Have you lived a life totally self created from an ideal or belief to achieve ‘perfection’, prepared to do whatever it takes to have a perfect family picture and life?

My family life appeared to be a perfect picture – I had an amazing husband, a great home, a successful business and we had a beautiful daughter who was, as people would say, a ‘dream baby’. I had all the things that perhaps many women dream of: perfect family, perfect child and perfect life.

Was I being greedy wanting more? Continue reading “Perfect Family Picture or NOT?” →

Very Early Signs of Pregnancy: My Breasts Told Me I Was Pregnant (Twice!)

~ womeninlivingness

I have been pregnant twice in my life and both times the first very early sign of these pregnancies came from my breasts.

My First Pregnancy (2007)

In my first pregnancy I knew I was pregnant a few days after conception:

  • My breasts had grown larger, were more full and were very tender.
  • They became so tender and the nipples so sensitive that wearing a bra was painful and not wearing a bra was painful.
  • Having the shower water run over my nipples was almost unbearable.
  • Lying on my stomach was not an option as any sort of pressure on my breasts was just not tolerable.
  • Wearing tops over my bare breasts was difficult. The tops had to be very fitted so there was no movement across my nipples, as any friction from the material was excruciating.
  • I also noticed that the veins in my breasts had become more prominent, my nipples had become larger and had darkened in colour.  Continue reading “Very Early Signs of Pregnancy: My Breasts Told Me I Was Pregnant (Twice!)” →

Motherhood & Detachment: an Essential Element to True Love

~ womeninlivingness ~ 1 Comment

by Bianca Barban, Melbourne, Australia

One of my roles in life is being a mother. I am blessed with 2 children, a daughter, 8yrs and a son, 7yrs. At times I have found motherhood and detachment difficult, mostly because I have been enmeshed in my children’s lives, taking on every emotion they feel and putting their needs before my own. Continue reading “Motherhood & Detachment: an Essential Element to True Love” →

When is the Right Time to Stop Breastfeeding?

~ womeninlivingness

by Nicole Serafin, age 41 years, Tintenbar, NSW, Australia

A challenge faced by many women no doubt, not just myself.

There is so much pressure out there on women to not only breastfeed but also how long they should breastfeed for. This is compounded by the conflicting articles and information, often making women feel guilty if they stop feeding too early or even the other way around, feeling criticised if they breastfeed for too long.

So what is the right amount of time to feed for? Continue reading “When is the Right Time to Stop Breastfeeding?” →