Category: Self Relationship

Relationships with Men Begin with My Relationship with Me

~ womeninlivingness

by Anonymous

I recently wrote a blog entitled Sex, relationships and a True Fairy Tale. Since then many things have unfolded for me (something I am sure many blog writers will relate to). Each time we publicly proclaim something (anonymously or not) we are asked to step up, and this time was no different.

Reading has been a big part of my life so it’s no surprise that my recent experience has reminded me of another type of story, the ‘Choose your own Adventure’ kind.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the concept a ‘Choose your own Adventure’ book is one that asks you to make a choice at the end of each chapter. This choice then dictates the next choice that would be available to you and so on. Continue reading “Relationships with Men Begin with My Relationship with Me” →

Relationships – Inspiring Love in Another

~ womeninlivingness ~ 3 Comments

I recently read a blog written by Raymond Karam about “The True Beauty of Women”.

This was a very inspiring blog in which I felt the depth of what this man was saying and what he was claiming for himself and also for all women. I felt how Raymond was very willing to deeply connect with, appreciate and celebrate the sacredness and power of a woman when she is really herself. Not only this, but he was sharing that every woman has this quality or way inside her equally, and that it is very natural.

I began to consider the possibility that maybe many men around me (such as Raymond) are starting to accept and reflect the truly lovely, tender and powerful men that they are, which is inviting women to feel that they are this same powerful person naturally on the inside, ready to be it at any time.

Pondering on this further, I recognised that when in a relationship, people will often ask their partner to be more loving. For example, a wife may want her husband to be more caring, loving and considerate, or the husband may ask his wife to be more understanding and less demanding or needy. I am now seeing that there are two ways to ask such things:- Continue reading “Relationships – Inspiring Love in Another” →

Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places, Only to Find it Was Already Within Me!

~ womeninlivingness

by Sharon Gavioli, Registered Nurse, Birth Educator, Counsellor, Brisbane, Australia

All my life I have had a knowing that life was about people and loving people. Despite this, as a young girl I learned that love meant that I should be good and put others’ needs before my own. This meant working hard to please my parents and friends. Throughout this, I felt a frustration at how I felt I had to be and at times would step out of line, which left me feeling bad that I had let another down. Then I would brush myself off and get back in the game in the pursuit of this love.

In my teenage years, I directed my quest for love in pursuing boys, hoping that a relationship would bring me the elusive love that I hadn’t quite found as a girl. After a few false starts, I found the man whom I was sure was going to bring me the love. Within a year of marriage, I started to feel disappointed and again frustrated that the love wasn’t pouring forth in our relationship. I tried to express this, but in the end decided that maybe having a baby would definitely be a sure winner to finally find that true love that I so longed for. Continue reading “Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places, Only to Find it Was Already Within Me!” →

Sex, Relationships and a True Fairy-tale

~ womeninlivingness

by Anonymous

I remember watching and reading fairy tales from a young age. I loved these movies and books full of beautiful, gentle and loving princesses that were friends with the animals (sometimes they were even able to train them to do the housework). These princesses were always truly good, kind and lovely in every way and I could feel that same princess loveliness in myself. Sometimes these princesses were persecuted by wicked step-monsters, but they retained their loveliness no matter what hardship they endured and always triumphed in the end, maintaining their grace and loveliness all the while. They would find prince charming and true love and get married, living happily ever after. There was no need to know what happened next, I could assume it was all smooth sailing from then on. Continue reading “Sex, Relationships and a True Fairy-tale” →

From Sensitivity Lost – To Joy in Finding the Real Me

~ womeninlivingness

by Nicole Serafin, Tintenbar, Australia 

As a child I was very sensitive and could feel what was ‘going on’ with people; I sometimes found this quite overwhelming. I also found with lots of people that there was little honesty in how they were actually feeling (in regard to their situation, for example), as though they were withholding from expressing what they actually wanted to say; or even at times that there would be an ‘underlying message’ to words spoken / actions done. I didn’t understand why people just didn’t say what it was they were actually feeling… Continue reading “From Sensitivity Lost – To Joy in Finding the Real Me” →

From Rip Cord Effect to True Love

~ womeninlivingness

My friends and I would often joke about the ‘rip cord effect’; when a woman gets married and then pulls the cord, like on a life vest, and ‘poof!’ – instantly she puffs out, putting on weight. My partner has also joked to me about this, but I could feel that it was from a genuine concern or fear that this would happen to me. I pondered on this more deeply, seeing it in my mother, and I reflected on times when I had put on weight in relationships, or ‘let myself go’.

In my teenage years and as a young adult I grew up not living as the lovely girl or gorgeous woman that deep down I felt I was. Living in such a way felt empty or bottomless… not living in the stillness and preciousness that I could feel myself to truly be. Somewhere along the line I was taught, shown or told that I could be this lovely woman when I had a man, got married and / or had children. So in my head I thought that if I had a man beside me, or became a wife or mother, I would no longer feel the empty and desperate feeling within. I then spent a greater portion of my life driving or pushing very hard to get a man and kids; I lost myself completely because every choice was based on what would enable me to reach my goal. Continue reading “From Rip Cord Effect to True Love” →

Letting go of ‘Trying to Fit In’

~ womeninlivingness

by Donna Gianniotis, Yoga Teacher, Sydney, Australia

I couldn’t help but feel the joy and the loveliness in the room at the recently held Women’s Group Presentation hosted by Natalie Benhayon in Sydney.

This led me to ponder  – I’ve been in many a room with women only, but why did this feel different?

The answer revealed itself throughout the afternoon: my conclusion being that here we were, a group of close to 100 women openly expressing in our honesty about how we live our lives. We explored various challenges that we may face living as women today, with one of the biggest of these being how we, as women, tend to want to ‘fit in’.  And how ‘fitting in’ takes us away from keeping our own personal rhythms that could truly support us and allow us a deeper connection to ourselves. Continue reading “Letting go of ‘Trying to Fit In’” →

Single Woman, Aged 38, No husband, No kids – No problem

~ womeninlivingness

by Zofia S, UK

The prospect of this article’s title, in my early 30’s, filled me, my single friends and probably most family members with dread – destined to have a life of misery and aloneness that was to be avoided!

Over the years, not once did I (nor any of my friends) really embrace ‘single status’, always in the hope of meeting someone at the next party or dinner etc. So why did I (and do so many others) struggle with this issue of being single? Why is it so important to us to have someone to call a boyfriend, partner or husband? What’s wrong with us being a single us? Is the only way to have fun, when one is with another? I asked myself such questions AND MORE – after all, I have good health, looks, own property, have a career, am financially, emotionally and mentally sound, am fun to be with and have no ‘baggage’ (kids or ex-husbands). Yet in spite of all this, I still felt a stigma (and could feel it from others too) of not being in a relationship; that there was something missing or that something was the matter, or wrong with me. “It will happen when you are not looking”, said friends who had successfully found ‘their key’. But I couldn’t help wonder to myself, had they really found the key, or just any key? Continue reading “Single Woman, Aged 38, No husband, No kids – No problem” →

The Woman

~ womeninlivingness

by Shannon Everest, Australia

A woman belongs to herself.

She may have a husband or a partner that she loves dearly, but she doesn’t belong to this man.

She may have children, but she does not belong to these children; though she can express beautifully as a mother with her children, being firm, loving, tender and supportive.

She has a mother and father herself, and even though these parents conceived her, gave birth to her and raised her from young, she never, ever belonged to them, but always to herself. Continue reading “The Woman” →

Mama Mia: Here I Go Again

~ womeninlivingness

by Sarah Davis, B.BSc, Grad Dip Applied Psychology, Australia

I have had many conversations recently with women about mothering. It has been truly lovely to connect and share openly – learning from each other’s reflections and supporting each other through honesty and inspiration. I find that the more honest I can be about how I have ‘approached’ motherhood, the more awareness I bring to how I have been living as a woman and how my body feels as a result of my choices. Often we share very similar accounts of the demands and ‘exhaustion’ of motherhood, as well as the intense ‘needs’ from our children, partners and society – well, as least that is how the conversation starts. Lately, these conversations have felt truly honest and inspiring as we explore more deeply ourselves as women within this experience and ‘dynamic’ of motherhood; the understanding that is developing is deeply inspiring and loving. Central to this unfolding is a claiming of our responsibility to make self-loving choices, and a commitment to self; basically that the ‘drama of motherhood’ is often a result of our own disregard and lack of self-worth – to the total detriment of our body and quality of relationships we adopt the maxim, the ‘tougher we do it’ the ‘better’ and ‘more committed’ mother we are. Correct? Continue reading “Mama Mia: Here I Go Again” →